Iceland Days 1&2

Day One

As we haven't had a holiday this year - because we're trying (and failing) to sell our house and move to Portugal, thereby making every day a holiday - we decided on a last minute adventure road trip somewhere or other. I decided on Iceland because I've always wanted to go and I suspected that if we don't go now, we never will. We captured Holly and Grace after their summer galavanting around rural Bulgaria and made them stay at home to look after the animals and off we went. 

Arrived in Keflavik (an hour west of Reykjavik) mid afternoon, picked up a hire car and headed south, the plan being to drive around the whole of Iceland in an anticlockwise direction. 

First stop was the well-known Blue Lagoon. It's only about 15 minutes from the airport and we were driving past so we decided to have a look, although we'd already decided to visit it properly on our last day before a late afternoon flight home. 

The lagoon itself is a wonder of nature -  completely BONKERS pale blue, opaque water amongst the black volcanic rock. Gazing through at the steamy public bathing area, I was reminded of Centre Parcs, Longleat, circa 1999, but without the white water rapids. This isn't necessarily a good thing but I shall reserve judgement until I've had the full experience. 

Drove on south to the coast then headed east, then inland at Porlakshöen, and up to Hveragerdi, where we spent our first night. 'Hver' means 'hot spring' and there is an actual HOT river that runs through the town. Use is made of this to grow tropical fruit and vegetables and the town is full of huge glowing greenhouses. We stayed in a small hotel/guesthouse which was actually ON the hot river. Our timber-floored room had a balcony over-looking the river, and steam spurted out of holes and cracks in the ground on the banks. We ate supper in the little restaurant - fish gratin - then donned our swimming gear and ran outside. Beneath our balcony was a 38 degree C hot-tub and under our room was a steam room. Not a posh spa kind of steam room - an authentic one, made of stone and accessed via an outside door, with crumbly walls and sulphurous steam spurting and gurgling from a hole in the corner in an entirely unpredictable and alarming way. With the outside temperature about 6 degrees,two glasses of red on board, and the river thundering by in the darkness, it was BONKERS. 

Day Two

Lovely breakfast, with the option to take an egg outside in a little net thing on the end of a fishing rod thing and cook it yourself by dangling it in a steam hole underground for 4 minutes. Declined the offer. Launched 'Operation Free Lunch' which involved surreptitiously building ham and cheese sandwiches and hiding them up my jumper for us to eat later in the car. Huge success. Should add (for the trolls) that no way was this stealing - we have small appetites compared to most and never get our money's worth at buffet-type breakfasts. 

Drove up the Hvitá valley to Geysir. Hilarious that Richard was so surprised and delighted by this. The big Geysir, after which all geysers are named, erupts unpredictably, but its neighbour Strokkur erupts every 5-10 minutes. We watched it erupt 4 times, Richard's whoops of joy and peals of laughter undiminished each time. BONKERS. 

Continued up the valley to Gullfoss (Golden Falls). Incredible double water-fall down into hidden ravine that took us both by surprise, especially the refreshing lack of health and safety precautions. 

Was really cold up there. Rich beginning to regret bringing no hat, no gloves, no scarf and just a moleskin jacket. To Iceland. ICEland. 

Drove back down the valley and then up the next one, apparently the longest glacial valley in Europe. Apart from great views of Hekla - a volcano once thought to be the literal gateway to Hell - this proved to be a mistake. Vast plains of lava for miles in every direction and the road turned into a gravel road halfway which meant driving 26 km at 15 mph. 

Rejoined Route 1, the circular route around Iceland, and headed east along the south coast. Stopped at two more spectacular waterfalls, both of which cascaded off the foothills of the Eyjafjalla volvano - that's the fecker that kept us stranded in India in 2010. Then on past Katla, its neighbour and big brother volcano, that historically always erupts shortly after Eyjafjalla. Look out, Europe, she's gonna blow any minute. It's covered in a huge glacier and glacial fingers drape down the valleys like melting wax. Rich and I try to outdo each other by coming out with geographical terms we remember from 'O' level geography. I lose when I point to a pile of rocks and say 'tundra'. Apparently. Although I'm still not convinced. 

On to Dyrhólaey, the southernmost tip of Iceland. Spectacular. Black sands. Fierce winds. Biting cold. And NO PUFFINS. Bitterly disappointed. I love puffins. 

Back on route 1 and headed east. Vast desolate ash plains for ten miles to our right and five miles to our left and a two hour drive across it to our next destination. Needed petrol. Or was it diesel? Didn't say anywhere. Checked hire car document  - 'diesel' box definitely crossed. Diesel pump wouldn't fit in tank. Concluded it must be petrol DESPITE WHAT DOCUMENTATION SAID. Set off across deserted vast plains in the failing light and driving rain, convinced car going to conk out and we'd be stranded (and bankrupted) and probably die. Like a couple of idiots. But we did it anyway. Phewee. It's seemingly a petrol car and documentation is wrong. Convinced now that car hire company did it on purpose because we refused to take out extra insurance. Bastards. 

Eventually found hotel at Hoff. The Hoff Hotel. Nestled in the foothills of Vatnajökull, the biggest glacier in Europe, looking out over 10 miles of ash, and in the middle of absolutely nowhere, it reminded me A LOT of the hotel in The Shining. 

Arrived at 7pm and restaurant was 'shut'. Only place to eat was back at Skaftafell - a petrol station about 20 km back the way we came. Had cheeseburger and chips in typical Icelandic fashion, bought a hat for Rich, then returned to our hotel. Fortunately we have a box of wine in our suitcase as at time of writing am convinced can hear child tricycling around the corridors and am fully expecting 'Jonny' to make an unforgettable entrance with an axe.